small and mighty

It's taken me a while to write about this. I've talked with lots of people about it and received mixed feedback. I myself go back and forth between what the right thing to do about it is. So today I'm going to post some of my thoughts and opinions (many of which may change in my mind in a couple of hours) so bear with me.

Oliver is small. Very small. He is in the zero percentile for weight for his age. It was shocking to me, and the news of it stung and took the wind out of me for a couple minutes.

I've spent many fitful nights awake worrying about it, and a couple tearful days. It gets exhausting to hear people wonder if I am starving my baby. For people to assume I'm not meeting his needs is incredibly disappointing for me. If you look at him, he is a happy baby. Always seems satisfied, smiling, active, and hitting all his milestones early. He is incredibly strong, but he is a really slender little guy. In my heart I feel like he is okay but everywhere I go from strangers to family I hear, "he is so tiny."

Yeah, I know.

I need to find some positive in this before I go crazy. So, while I spend the rest of the day trying to force feed Oliver to fatten him up, here are a few thoughts on the advantages of having a pixie baby:

1. Easier to cart around.
2. Gets a lot of use out of size 3month clothing
3. Seeing the shock value for people who ask how old he is.
4. Less backaches for me and my husband.
5. Possible future as a runway model.
6. Great abs
7. Only needs a 1/4 shot of tequila to get totally wasted.
8. When people think I only had a baby a month ago and look fantastic, I don't correct them.

The weather outside is frightful!

Sorry he isn't smiling in these.

I have a touch of cabin fever with this insane weather, but for the most part I have LOVED being snowed in with my little man. I've lounged in my pj's all day, skipped a shower yesterday and didn't care how bad I smelled. Had time to keep up on dishes, get a bit more organized, and finish wrapping my presents. Got out for a little while to do some last minute shopping too, but the best thing I did was PLAY.
No, not in the snow, but on the living room floor rolling around with Oliver. He does the cutest full-on giggles now, and it melts my heart that I am the one who can make him laugh the loudest :) The past couple weeks he has been working on sitting up, and has pretty much mastered the skill. In fact, it is time to get carpet because the tiny little rug I let him play on just isn't big enough for him anymore. Which leads me to a "Bad Mom" incident. (Just one of many I'm sure!).

I could hear Oliver playing in the living room rug, while I was doing some quick dishes in the kitchen. He started to whine a little, kinda like he does when it's timed to be changed, or he is bored. I peeked in at him and he was gone! AND GUESS WHERE I FOUND HIM....on the hardwood floor underneath the COFFEE TABLE. Ahhh, I felt so bad. He was fine, but now I keep all eyes on him since he has become much more mobile. I had no idea he could go that far.

I will post pictures soon of our latest. Wishing everyone a Merry Christmas Eve!

Sleepless in Milwaukie

I thought babies loved to sleep. Well, not this one.

It is the most challenging part of my day when 7 pm rolls around. I have to admit that I start to dread it. I've read all the books, asked my mom friends for advice (p.s. still interested in hearing it if you have it to give!), tried my darnedest to stick to a routine. But every night comes the same struggle and the same high pitched wails from my incredibly exhausted son who can't seem to drift off into baby slumber! It leaves me so frustrated and tired. Not to mention the HUGE pang of guilt I feel for letting him cry even a little.

I think the main problem is that even with consistency of routine (i.e. read a book, rock, sing lullaby, feed) it isn't the same person who puts him down every night. I leave for work at 6:30pm some nights, so Nate puts him down. I think the new plan of attack will be to have Nate put him down to sleep EVERY night.

On the upside, I'm sure when he is a teenager all he will want to do is sleep....or is that just sleep-in? Hopefully soon "Sleepless in Milwaukie" will become "Silent Slumber in Milwaukie."